WELL, I FOR ONE am delighted with the new lockdown measures that have been put in place. I mean, so straightforward, all makes total sense, gives us all a sense of purpose when we can understand the logic in putting these measures in place. Right? Ha!
Well just for clarity and for all those slightly confused, please see below for a list of some of the new Level 5 restrictions – explained. Every disaster movie in history begins with the government ignoring a scientist, so we were off to a good start.
1. First, do not leave the house for any reason. That is unless you have a reason to leave the house and then it’s okay.
2. Shops and businesses must close. Unless they need to stay open.
3. Don’t be afraid of the deadly virus. It only kills people that are vulnerable and those who are not vulnerable.
4. Households are not allowed to mix with other households. Unless you are single, or in a bubble or erm, eh? But our germ-ridden kids can sit in classes of up to 30 and cough into each other’s eyeballs all day. Which leads me to rule 5.
5. This time, the government has decided to keep all creches, schools and educational bodies open as this virus does not affect children, except for those children that it does affect in which case they must remain isolated. Any child attending college or university can attend as their high IQ level can ward off the deadly virus. If you are not a child, but are attending college or University, then you are still safe to attend as apparently Covid-19 is aware that you are a student and you will not become infected.
6. It is important that you eat healthy and exercise daily for your mental health. But only eat what you have at home so you don’t have to go to the supermarket. And don’t exercise beyond the 5km rule but you can exceed the 5km if you wish to avail of the ‘Click and Collect’ service at your favourite clothes shop. All of which is in place for your mental health by the way.
7. And lastly, my personal favourite. Go outside as much as possible. But stay indoors as much as possible.
So you see? Clear as mud.
So, what does that mean for us as a family? James and I made the decision that we would keep Jamie home from Playschool until things hopefully settle down and the virus is under control. (If ever). Jamie is a wee creature of habit and as much as we feel it’s healthy for kids to attend playschool, play and be with their friends, I don’t think it’s healthy to be taking Jamie to Playschool for a couple of weeks and then another positive case of Covid arises. Then the Playschool closes, then we have to get the kids tested again. Back to square one and so on. Jamie likes Yo-Yos, but he doesn’t like being one.
And BOOM! We’re back to March 2020 again. Lockdown life. A 4-year-old and a 2-year-old in the house 24-7 for the foreseeable. And for all those parents that go on social media with photos of their kids baking together, having fun in the garden together and hugging, saying, ‘let’s embrace this chance we have to spend with our kids.’ They actually look like this in real life (me included BTW!)
Stage 1. After a day..
Stage 2. After a week..
Stage 3. A fortnight..
Stage 4. A month..
It’s only been a fortnight since Jamie’s been at home full time and I’m already at a definite stage 3, borderline 4! We’ve done the baking, the playing in the garden, the colouring in, the paints and the Lego building. So what now?
With Halloween around the corner, the usual scary movies are starting to appear on Sky and Netflix. My two love Halloween and scary stuff but it’s trying to get a balance between enjoyable scary and then traumatising. And given my track record with scary movies (The IT article, remember that?) I’m not the best judge to decide. I have to say, I’m still totally traumatised at the Wizard of Oz! Jamie and Lily had heard the Ghostbusters theme tune on Alexa and thought this was great. You can imagine when an ad for Ghostbusters came on the TV with the theme tune going in the background, Jamie became unglued!
“Mummy, Mummy look!” Squealed Jamie. ‘Ghostbusters is on the telly! Can we watch, pleeeeeeeease!’
“Err, it’s not on yet.” I said thinking on my feet. ‘You need to ask Daddy.’
“Okay Mummy!” Jamie said all excited.
So, naturally, as the day went on and the hours passed, Jamie had completely forgotten all about Ghostbusters by the time daddy got home. HA!
“Hi guys.” Daddy says while walking through the door.
Jamie speeds down the hall. “DADDY DADDY!” (Not even leaving breath for commas.) “Can we watch Ghostbusters! Pleeeeeeese!” Pleads Jamie.
“Err. Go and ask Mummy.” Replies James.
Fox ache.
“Okay then, just a wee bit and we’ll see if it’s not too scary.” I said.
Three days, 6 re-runs and the Ghostbusters soundtrack on loop, later…
“Look Lily is the green ghost bit!” Shouts Jamie.
“Hahahahahaha!” Squeals Lily in hysterics.
So much for a possible traumatising, they think its hilarious! The only thing now is, Jamie has a new response every time I ask him to do something.
Me – “Jamie! Can you tidy up those toys please?”
Jamie – “Who you gonna call?”
Me – “Jamie, go and brush your teeth.”
Jamie – “Who you gonna call?”
What started off as funny and cute, is now just freaking annoying and if I’m asked who I’m gonna call one more time?
I’m going to say, adoption services!!
Fox. Ache.
