The Mummy Diaries: Two babies – Week 8

The Mummy Diaries: Two babies – Week 8

by Emma Hargan
article from Tuesday 14, August, 2018

HOW TO DEAL with a 2-month-old and the terrible twos? Anyone? We have well and truly entered the dreaded terrible two phase this week. To be honest, I had read about this and been told how bad it was, but I don’t think I had quite understood the level of psychotic behaviour – and that’s just me!

At first I thought this was just part of the ‘new sibling’ process and that Jamie was just testing the water in order to take the attention from Lily to him. It starts off with the little things like, ‘Get out of the bin!’, ‘Stop licking the plates in the dishwasher!’ and ‘Stop eating food off the floor!’. No I’m not talking about a dog, this is me shouting at my 2-year-old son. 

The problem as well is that Jamie isn’t really talking yet. This is definitely my fault as I have always known what Jamie’s needs or wants are, by just a look or him pointing to what he wants. This has resulted in him not needing to speak as he has come to the conclusion that he doesn’t have too. To try and resolve this, I am no longer jumping to Jamie’s every demand as I’m trying to get him to ask for what he wants. In his frustration, he is resorting to full blown tantrums, slamming doors and literally screaming the house down when he doesn’t get what he wants. I sometimes think my house resembles a mental institute out of a horror movie where my toddler is running around the house naked, screaming no, no, no!

So Monday morning I decided I would use a different approach as simply shouting at Jamie all day was getting me nowhere and was resulting in even more meltdowns. I had read an article by some child expert on how to calmly deal with your toddler when they are misbehaving. They advised that instead of shouting, try to calmly say, ‘No, that’s naughty, would you like a hug?’ and then the said child should stop what they are doing and get what they are craving – attention. It didn’t take too long before I could start putting this theory to the test. 

6.59am - Jamie wakes up

7.05am - Jamie is lifted out of his cot and plays in his room

7.08am - Jamie is screaming because he doesn’t want to wear slippers and is opening and slamming the door

7.09am - I enter the room and calmly say ‘No that’s naughty. Would you like a hug?’

7.10am - Jamie launches a toy car at my head.

Well, bang goes that theory. At this point I’m beginning to question, is it me? Maybe I’m a terrible parent? Maybe I’ve just got a difficult child? But the answer is no, this is a worldwide parental issue and the reason for this is simple…. A 2-year-old just doesn’t give a f##k.

What I mean is, I’ll say to Jamie, ‘watch your fingers on the door’. He then screams at me and slams the door and runs off. Or, ‘stop swinging that toy next to your sister’ and he throws it with even more velocity right next to her. The terrible twos isn’t a case of being a testing time, this is about survival. 

Thankfully, I’ve also read that this period doesn’t last long. It’s only a year out of your life. Yes – only a whole f##king year!!! Up until the last few weeks, Jamie was the best sleeper and we could put him into his cot at bedtime and he would just roll over and go to sleep. So after another long evening of listening to Jamie screaming and crying the house down when he goes to bed, I went upstairs, lifted him out of his cot, wiped the tears off his face and sat on the floor and cuddled him until he fell asleep. 

Maybe I’m looking at this phase in the wrong way? My little man is just trying to express himself in the only way he knows how. He’s learning and has no fear in doing things. He’s only trying to help when he’s emptying out the cupboards. He doesn’t hold grudges or worry about anything. He sees the good in everyone and last but by no means least – he thinks a kiss and a cuddle fixes everything. 

Maybe I should take a leaf out of Jamie’s book?

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